


Truth or Dare Turns Into a Feels-Dump Bonanza

by toastyboi



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, but like a majority of it is dave just fucking letting it loose, but loose hips loose, essentially hes describing how pretty john is on a dare and it gets out of hand, its all pesterlog, let that shit out, not like emotional baggage loose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-08 23:55:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8868154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toastyboi/pseuds/toastyboi
Summary: dave got dared to describe the way john looked to him and damn if he wasn't going to write john a goddamn one-act about how gorgeous he was





	1. Chapter 1

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologst [EB]

TG: so hey  
TG: a majority of what im going to be getting at is not to be taken lightheartedly  
TG: in fact i want you to imagine that im saying all this in a tone of voice like i just killed your father  
TG: imagine i brutally maimed your father  
TG: dont actually do that  
TG: fuck  
TG: you get my point  
TG: anyways because i am the greatest friend and rose lalonde can suck gratefully on my nards im gonna do this in one swoop  
TG: straight up  
TG: so like  
TG: you know how typically normal human beings have normal human being faces  
TG: nose eyes mouth ears  
TG: the essentials  
TG: you dont have that  
TG: i mean TECHNICALLY you do but what im getting at is that you are not a human being  
TG: maybe youre extraterrestrial idk but regardless of your species title youre really fucking  
TG: fucking  
TG: okay start over  
TG: i think youre  
TG: no  
TG: goddamnit  
TG: heads shoulders knees and toes john it starts with the head so im gonna start with the head  
TG: none of this beating around the bush bullcrap  
TG: hows that for alliteration  
TG: ok  
TG: top of the head  
TG: you got hair  
TG: okay hair  
TG: your hair in no way shape or form resembles a cloud but at the same time its like the perfect goddamn description  
TG: fluffy and all over the place  
TG: soft enough for somebody to just kinda reach out  
TG: run their hands through it and decide im gonna do this for fucking ever  
TG: can your hair be the embodiment of a literal cloud or does that not work  
TG: whatever  
TG: onto the face portion of the rest of your entire body  
TG: you  
TG: have  
TG: eyes  
TG: yeah you have eyes but goddamnit theyre not NORMAL eyes  
TG: theyre like blue  
TG: deep voice blue  
TG: open space blue  
TG: theyre so blue that they make me FEEL blue but not the sad emotion blue just the color blue and sometimes i get super goddamn distracted when i stare at them  
TG: i dont stare at them  
TG: i dont fucking stare at your eyes dont quote me on that  
TG: next is  
TG: you know im just gonna take your entire face up as one section  
TG: your nose is perfect and im not sure how you managed to sculpt that thing but its there and its real and i cant believe it  
TG: youre being too obvious with your perfectness approach to hiding your alien-ness john egbert im gonna have to call MIB on you  
TG: maybe they can do something about  
TG: all those fucking freckles making a literal star map on your face  
TG: or your overbite  
TG: your really sweet overbite  
TG: you know what i dont wanna do this anymore  
TG: i think youre real goddamn pretty its made pretty obvious right now but if i continue trying to craft poems like a master wordsmith im gonna lose my mojo real quick  
TG: youre hands are nice and youre real fucking tall which makes for some quality tender embraces  
TG: you could trim some of your goddamn body hair  
TG: you COULD but maybe id be disappointed just an fyi  
TG: and you could also not get any more perfect  
TG: oh fuck my ass  
TG: well there you have it  
TG: my most perfectly worded mistake

turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected at 17:24 PM


	2. John's Jammin' Feelings Jam (Alternatively titled 'Dave Didn't Actually Fuck Up')

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yeah i realized i probably left this whole thing incomplete so here is a log between buddies in response to dave's unloading & also thank you to the two people who commented giving me motivation to do something productive for once

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

EB: uh, dude.  
TG: here it comes  
EB: what was that all about?  
TG: and there it is  
TG: brace yourself for impact eggplant parmejohn because boy do you have a storm comin  
TG: due to events that happened with rose mfucking lalonde and a poorly spun bottle i was metaphorically wedgied into spilling beans  
TG: the beans being my thoughts on your general appearance  
TG: now if it had just been rose saying haha describe john i probably would have used some sort of hotdog analogy for your entirety but nah she was like dump out all your true thoughts and you know me  
TG: striving for perfection  
EB: so you seriously meant all that stuff?  
TG: yep  
EB: just give me a second to type here speed racer!  
EB: i thought that was totally lame.  
EB: but i mean that in the best way possible!  
EB: i dunno, it was really sweet and i had a feeling you weren't joking about it.  
EB: so don't worry about it dude, it was kinda nice.  
EB: i've never really heard somebody describe me before. i didn't honestly think i looked that good.  
EB: maybe you're just a weenie who's obnoxiously infatuated with me.  
TG: you  
TG: are a literal piece of shit  
EB: i'm joking, jeeze!  
EB: if it makes you feel any better, i'm probably a little obnoxiously infatuated with you too.  
EB: only a little.  
TG: so what im hearing from your end is you appreciated the literal one-act i wrote about your appearance and support it wholeheartedly  
EB: essentially.  
TG: would you do it  
EB: what?  
TG: describe me  
TG: get deep into this sappy bullshit dude its like a tradeoff  
TG: eye for an eye but in this case its disgustingly sappy fondness for disgustingly sappy fondness  
EB: i didn't say anything about sappy fondness, but ok i guess!  
TG: you didnt protest either  
EB: shut up dave, just gimme a minute.  
EB: i also think you're kinda pretty.  
EB: i mean yeah, handsome could also be used to describe you i guess, but pretty is definitely the main thing here.  
EB: you look kind of like a prince? your facial features, mostly.  
EB: you have full lips and high cheekbones and your eyebrows are like, sculpted. i'm 100% sure you trim them.  
EB: i don't see your eyes much, but they're... sharp?  
EB: intense.  
EB: i probably couldn't make eye contact with you for more than ten seconds without getting grossly flustered.  
EB: you have a lot of scars too which just kind of adds to the whole princely charm thing.  
EB: you also have super nice hair. i can't really run my fingers through it since it's so curly, but playing with it is nice.  
EB: you're just.  
EB: nice.  
EB: man, this feels kind of weird to say when i know you're reading all of it!  
EB: is that up to par with your standards or should i keep going?  
TG: keep going  
TG: please  
EB: heh. loser.  
EB: despite your size, your hands are still pretty big.  
EB: not like sasquatch big, but still big.  
EB: hand holding material, probably.  
EB: and sometimes when you don't think anybody is looking you laugh a little bit to yourself. i dunno if it's because you thought of something funny or whatever, but it's really cute.  
EB: i've kinda learned how to read your "facial expressions" too.  
EB: when you're amused both your brows raise over your shades, and your lips kinda curl up.  
EB: and when you're anxious and stuff you tend to bite on your lip or on the inside of your cheek.  
EB: you also can't seem to sit still! you're always bouncing your leg or tapping your fingers.  
EB: i mean, unless you're near someone. then you use them as an anchor almost.  
EB: remember the time you fell asleep on me during titanic?  
EB: that was really cute. you clung to my arm for a solid half an hour.  
EB: ...that's all i got. for now.  
EB: how was that?  
TG: im coming over  
EB: what??

turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected at 23:54 PM  
ectoBiologist [EB] disconnected at 23: 55 PM


	3. The Real Deal (Again, Alternatively Titled 'Smooch McFest')

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> smooch mcfest

It was all a blur after that, really.

The movie he had been watching fades into background noise as Dave gets himself up, cold fingers rubbing the sleep caked around his eyes. He stands, stretches, the sweatpants he had thrown on the night before now hanging loosely from his hips. He touches his hair, blindly fumbling for his shades before sliding them on. The light would hurt too much, despite it barely filtering through the cracks in his blinds. He's trying to remain calm, but anyone could tell that he was trembling.

Winter. It's cold, and the orange sun contrasts against the stupidly white snow covering the Washington ground. The color fades into Dave's room, making everything light up only slightly with the hue. It's nice. The colors contrast greatly with himself, he thinks. Hair coiled into tight curls, bleached from their natural brown. His skin is darker than ever yet it still seems to be smothered with freckles. High cheekbones. Tired, sunken eyes. Too many scars. He's too short to be considered mammoth. Maybe a growing sprout at best.

He can't help but admire himself in the mirror- not because of the fact that he thought of himself as attractive, but because  _John_ did. John blatantly stated his thoughts on Dave's appearance and personality and quirks and  _god_ he was in deeper than he thought he was. His fingers brushed along his chapped lips, imagining what it would be like if he were to press them to John's. Maybe it'd be nice- he bet John tasted like gushers and cold-brew coffee. 

His thoughts were getting out of hand. 

The next thing Dave knew, he was applying chapstick like it was the most important thing in his life and heading out of the door with nothing else on other than a loose sweatshirt and some rainboots that he found in the back of his closet. He was from Texas- there was no way in hell he could have prepared for winter like this. But here he was anyways, rip ready and roaring to possibly get some nice kisses in before the day ends. The sun was already setting, but that didn't matter. If stuff botched, he knew John would let him stay over anyways. Best bros for life and all that, even if your best bro happens to want to kiss you straight to Nirvana. 

Dave is shaking more by the time he gets to John's house, both from the cold and from nervousness of it all. His lips are pursed into a thin line, face flushed from the tips of his ears down to his Adam's apple. Again, it's very hard to tell if it's from the cold or from embarrassment, but it was still definitely there. His fingers tap against the door in a shaky pattern, the latch clicking and the door swinging open. 

 _Fuck,_ Dave could have passed out right in his spot. There John stood, glasses hanging low on the bridge of his nose. He was wearing a nice blue sweater and a pair of semi-loose sweatpants, a pen tucked behind his ear and his hair all disheveled like he had just gotten up from a nap. Maybe he had been writing music or something for homework when Dave came by, who fucking knows. Dave himself found that he was mentally beating around the bush, his eyes roaming over John's features for a moment too long. John was the first to break the silence, his overbite worrying against his bottom lip in a way that made every ounce of blood Dave had in his system rush up to his face. 

"Are you gonna come in, dude? You look like you're about to catch hypothermia."

John had to have just woken up. His voice was scratchy and tired, but still deep enough to send chills down Dave's spine. He just nodded, stepping in so he could kick off the boots and let himself live in the warmth of John's house. He'd much rather be curled up under the dude's arm, but he'd be getting to that later. For right now he had to get by the rockier part, which was talking to John about their pseudo-feelings-jam extravaganza. 

"So, John--"

"You have a crush on me."

 _There_ was the smugness that Dave had grown used to. He seemed shock by the blatant statement, but it wasn't  _wrong,_ so it's not like he could say anything against it. His mouth hung open slightly in stunned silence, John's own face sliding into a large grin. 

"Stop looking so shocked about it, you essentially spilled everything to me in a furious amount of messages! I already told you dude, I'm also kinda sorta obnoxiously infatuated with you, so everything's mutual. That's what you wanted to come over about, right?" John asked, his tone mostly teasing. His eyes held a certain amount of fondness for the man in front of him though, staring at him with an affectionate glint in his eye. 

"You're such a dick John, oh my god." Dave mumbled, bringing his hands up to rub at his eyes. "Maybe I could have been pulling roses out of my pocket or something- you just ruined the entire confession experience by being a literal wet piece of bread. Come on man, you just harshed my  _entire_ mellow. I'm gonna have to do all that again, including typing out the messages correctly so we can restart this whole thing. Cut, take 2 on Dave Strider's Adventure into John Egbert's Possible Maybe Love Life. Like Christ dude, have a little compa-- oh."

It wasn't anything more than a hug that Dave had been pulled into, but it was one of the best hugs he's ever received. John's arms were tucked softly around him, one warm hand rubbing against his back in what seemed to be a soothing gesture. Dave hesitantly wrapped his arms around John's middle in return, fingers clutching against the fabric as his face pressed against the side of John's neck. John huffed out a laugh at that, tilting his head against Dave's. There was a slight warm pressure against Dave's ear, only registering afterwards that John had put a kiss there. 

"Quit whining about it you big baby." John's sarcasm had completely melted away now, the only thing in his soft tone being absolute fondness. His lips found Dave's cheek again and landed there in a quick peck, but there was no way Dave was just gonna leave it at that. His head tilted, their noses bumping clumsily up against each other as Dave essentially sneak-attacked John into possibly one of the best smooches in the history of mackin'. There was a little too much teeth and John's mouth had been semi-open which made it pretty awkward, but they got the hang of it after a few seconds of readjusting. It was slow, sweet, and Dave was  _right._

Gushers and cold brew coffee. 

The kiss was short but definitely enough for him. It was an emotionally tender moment, so instead of pushing it, they both silently agreed to go and sit back on the couch. John lead Dave over by the hand even though Dave knew perfectly well where the couch was, sitting down with enough room for Dave to get comfortable. He didn't use any of the couch space provided for him, instead sliding down immediately next to John so he was able to lean up against his side. John huffed out another laugh, not seeming to mind as he wrapped his arm around Dave's middle. 

"Talk about icicle over here. You're gonna really need to start bundling up dude, I can feel you shaking." John mumbled, tracing tiny patterns against Dave's side out of pure habit. Dave lightly hit his chest, trying to ease the trembling of his shoulders by leaning further against John, his cheek pressed up against his shoulder. He didn't say anything, merely laying, maybe even pushing a small kiss there. They were fine like that for awhile, thinking in silence and leaning with each other. Eventually though, John grew dissatisfied and hauled Dave closer (essentially into his lap), simply holding him there in a comforting manner. 

Dave, although startled, was quick to adjust himself to the position. His arms made their way around John's neck, putting his head back where it had been in their previous hug position. John affectionately squeezed his sides, mumbling something under his breath. 

"Speak up, dork. Nobody can hear you when you mumble." Dave says, while mumbling and further tucking himself against the curve of John's neck. Like hell he's not gonna pounce on the opportunity to cuddle the shit out of this guy, he's cold as balls. 

"I said, I think I love you. I mean, that's already been established since you've been my best friend for forever and all, but. Yeah, you know what I mean." John's voice was soft, trying not to say anything to cross boundaries. Dave shifted again, removing his head from it's comfy space so he could lean both their foreheads together. John leaned into the moment before he could even get a word in, their lips brushing up against each other again before delving back into the kiss. Again, they didn't try to rush things, nor did either of them really want to. It was a slow, meaningful few kisses before John was pulling back first, lazily pushing a long (and slightly obnoxious) smooch against the side of Dave's neck. He made a weird noise of protest mixed with a laugh, shoulders hunching even as John resorted to just nosing there, no grossly wet smooches involved. 

After a second to calm himself down, Dave raised a hand to rake his fingers through John's hair, playing with it a bit. He wanted to think over everything just to make sure he wouldn't say something he regretted. And, even after all the worry and years of goddamn beating around the bush, his feelings hadn't changed a bit. 

"Yeah, man. I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit// i added more to the ending because i rushed it


End file.
